Thursday, April 3, 2008

G is for "Goin' to the Chapel. . . .

and we're gonna get ma-a-a-rried"

That's right, we're FINALLY engaged :) (When we talked to Jake's grandma she said 'What took him so long?') Officially, with the ring (as we've known for quite some time we were going to get married. . . eventually). Well, not quite the actual ring yet, just the diamond. I have to figure out how to get the setting I want that because it's not sold at any jewelry stores near us. We went out yesterday to look at some settings to see if I could find something similar, but no luck yet.

And I guess technically it won't be in a chapel, either :) We're probably going to head to Sonoma Valley and get married in a vineyard. No church wedding for me. It's not that I don't believe in God, I do, but I don't align myself with a particular religion anymore. Growing up Catholic and 13 years of Catholic school, I think, sometimes do that to a person. So, I really don't want to be a hypocrite and get married in the Chruch where I agree to raise my kids as Catholic and whatnot, when I honestly don't know what we'll do with kids! (Never mind the fact that we're in violation of the Catholic rules anyway by living together before we're married!)

Jake wants to get married on his parents anniversary (April 6), but that happens to be a Monday, so we might mix it up a little and have the party before the actual ceremony :)

I'm very, very happy. I couldn't really sleep last night, partially excitement, partially a little nerves. Nerves at the slightly overwhelming task of planning (thankfully we have a friend in San Francisco who will help!) and bigger nerves about talking to my Dad. Without going into the gory details, my parents are divorced and I don't really get along with my step mother and, needless to say, she and my mum do not get along either. Dad has told me in the past he will (at least partially) pay for the wedding, so when I call to tell him we're engaged I also plan to tell him that my step mother isn't invited to the wedding, in case he wants to change his mind about paying. I know that probably sounds horribly selfish, but it's going to be a very small wedding, and my step mother is not a nice person (she made a scene at my grandmothers funeral for goodness sake!) and I don't want the potential drama. I also don't want my own mum to be at all uncomfortable, since I'm her one and only child and I only plan on getting married once! I'm just anticipating a very uncomfortable conversation, but better now than 2 weeks before the wedding, right?!

So, if anyone has tips to share about long distance wedding planning, I'm all ears! I'm hoping it's as easy as my brain says it could be. . . . we just want something small and simple. I have a crazy notion of possibly knitting myself a wedding shawl, and knitting shawls for my attendant(s), too. I'm not sure if I'll have just one maid of honor or two. I have two very good friends, and I'm not sure I could choose (and I wasn't maid of honor in either of their weddings, so I can't use reciprocity to decide!) I think Jake may have a tough time deciding between his brother and one of his good friends, too (he was Best Man to both) so maybe we'll break that rule too and have two best men & maids of honor! :)

Alright, now I'm just rambling, so I'll stop and try not to turn the blog into an all consuming wedding center!

And, PS, just for those of you who may be unaware, when I say finally, I do mean FINALLY. . . Jake and I have been together since July 2001 :) Jake said he expected that I'd be the one doing the asking soon if he didn't get off his butt and do it! (After all, I did kiss him first!) Remind me sometime and I'll tell you the story of how we got together. It's all Megan's fault :) See, Meg, I told you the 'P' in FSIL could go away :)

PPS - It's really hard to take a good photo of a diamond, so I apologize to Jake if he's reading this that it doesn't look nearly as breathtaking as it is!

25 comments:

DeuceMom said...

COGRATULATIONS!!!

You're right, we've considered you guys "married" and part of the family for years now, but the whole DeuceFamily is so happy for you both!

Gorgeous diamond too!

Ash said...

Congrats! That is so pretty - from what I can see from a picture.

Sarah said...

congratulations! Have fun planning.

Tamiknits said...

CONGRATS! That is so exciting:)

KnitKat said...

YAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!! My hunny totally shocked me when he proposed, so I remember the nerves well. I also planned a long-distance wedding - well, I live in CT, and we got married in PA. It was hard to just trust a lot of things that were happening. Like, we picked our place, but then everything else for it, food, decorations, layout, was decided over the phone. We also didn't have a religious wedding. We got married at the town courthouse at noon, and then at 6pm the same day, my grandmother sort of presided over us exchanging vows to each other for our loved ones. So wonderful.

P.S. I tagged you, with details in my blog. I wanna know some other quirky things about you ;)

Laura said...

Congratulations!!

Becca said...

Nice rock!! Congratulations! I had no idea you weren't married, so I was a bit confused when I first started reading, heehee.

I'm no help at all planning weddings, since we went to the courthouse then swung by Taco Bell afterwards. No family at all was invited, partly because my parents had divorced 4 years earlier and I had some similar issues as you face.

My only advice is to TOTALLY have the wedding YOU want. My family has given me a lot of grief over the years about our simple, quiet, quick, and easy wedding. Oh, and cheap, it was very cheap. But DH and I do not regret a single detail.

Just get lots of photos whatever you do!

sarah said...

CONGRATULATIONS! How exciting! :)

Jen said...

Oh congratulations!!! A couple at my knit night just got engaged this week too! I'm looking forward to reading about lots of wedding plans

2paw said...

Congratulations!! That's wonderful news. Good luck with the family trickiness. Here, if you're a Mick, you have to attend 'classes' for months before hand and then pass a test (Hint: always say you would forgive infidelity!!) before they will allow you to marry in the Church!!! Knitting shawls sounds an excellent and very appropriae idea!!!

Sarah said...

YAY!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Wishing you every happiness together and stress free planning.

If you are going small, and at a vineyard, I'm sure they have planners who will do most stuff for you. Can I suggest a hot air balloon ride over the vineyard on a trip out there or the weekend of the wedding? It is a most spectacular experience!

IrishgirlieKnits said...

Congratulations!!! yay!! (seriously, you've been living in sin...thank goodness this is being taken care of...hehehehe says the girl who also went to Catholic school forever!!).

My sister just got back from a wedding in Sonoma Valley....how can you go wrong!! It'll be beautiful!

Good luck with the dad talk...my parents are divorced and my poor SIL had so much stress planning her wedding and trying to keep our mom happy. Should be fun this weekend at lil guys 1-year birthday, first time dad and mom together since seven years ago at the wedding! Fun fun!! :) So I'm with you sister!

IrishgirlieKnits said...

Oh, and absolutely gorgeous diamond!!

Cheryl in VA said...

congrads Carly!!! So glad it finally happened for you.

I can tell you with total certainty that having two 'maids of honour' and two 'best men' has been done before... at my wedding. We, much like you did not want a church wedding, but we did ours in Sedona, AZ at sunset in and amongst the red rocks. Totally gorgeous.

Having a friend out there is key, and also plan at least 1 trip to do some of the final decisions in person. It is definitely worth the cost of the trip.

See you soon at YfB

Gotta Knit! said...

Congrats!

Brittany said...

So happy for you my dear friend! Hope things go smoothly in talking to your dad. I'm so excited to help with any planning if you need me. I already suggested it to Jake, but perhaps a trip to Boston is in order. We can do some wedding shopping!

Marie said...

Congratulations!
And I thought you and Jake WERE married. Have fun planning everything.

Miss Me said...

congratulations! good luck with the planning and the conversation with dad... my fil and his wife were "difficult" about our wedding. it's YOUR day so make it special for YOU! (as you may be able to tell, we caved in a bit...)

kemtee said...

Ho-lee crap. Congratufrickinlations!

Advice from one who's been there: Do it your way. I caved on a lot of stuff to make it nice for everyone else, and still regret it these eight years later.

Nice rock, by the way.

LotusKnits said...

Congrats! That's awesome! If you need any small wedding tips, maybe I can help :)

Vicki Knitorious said...

Congratulations!!!

Anne said...

OH MY! Congratulations =) Tough to photo or not, it looks like it's just gorgeous. I'm so very happy for you!

JessicaRose said...

CONGRATULATIONS!

wow I dont check the internet for a week and I really do miss a lot.

A Knitting Blog with a little of this and a little of that. said...

Congratulations!!! The ring is beautiful :)

Martha G said...

Oh! How did I miss this! Congratulations!